Archive for the Horror Movie Review Category

Remake vs. Original: Let Me In vs. Let the Right One In

Posted in Film Review, Horror Movie Review, Remake vs. Original with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on October 20, 2010 by xymarla

Welcome back to Remake vs. Original, wherein Hollywood must answer to my poison pen for their incessant remakes! Today we bring you the ULTIMATE BATTLE:

let me in vs. let the right one in

Round One: The basics.

Let Me In. USA, 2010. Written and directed by Matt Reeves. 116 mins.

Let the Right One In. Sweden, 2008. Written by John Ajvide Lindqvist from his own novel. Directed by Tomas Alfredson. 115 mins.

Title:

Let Me In is the title of the American release of the novel, because publishers thought the original title was too long. I happen to love long titles, and Let Me In just doesn’t have the same poetry. -2

Let The Right One In is one of the eeriest and most elegant titles ever, and it’s the one chosen by novelist Lindqvist. If it’s good enough for him, it should be good enough for you, AMERICA. +2

Country:

Speaking of AMERICA, I love my country bunches. But not when it comes to remaking foreign movies that just came out two years before. I never EVER like that, because JUST READ SUBTITLES, AMERICA. It’s super easy! -1

Sweden! They have snow and Lisbeth Salander and reindeer and aquavit and the Sami! I took a class on the Sami people once and they are quite interesting. Also, meat pies! I forget, did I mention Lisbeth Salander? +2 (for Lisbeth) Continue reading

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Fantastic Fest!

Posted in A+ Review, Action Movie Review, Film Review, Horror Movie Review, Sci-Fi Movie Review with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on September 30, 2010 by xymarla

fantastic fest

You guys! I went to Fantastic Fest last weekend! True, I was only there for 2 days with a daytime badge, so I missed just about every single huge premiere. AND YET! I had an amazing time, saw incredible films, hung out and sang karaoke with celebrities, and I can’t wait to go back next year! Let this be a lesson to you, friends. You can totally do Fantastic Fest with no money and no time. It’s doable!

So I’m not going to get into the parties/celebrities aspect of it, even though that’s definitely a significant part of the festival, just because I know my bestie poshdeluxe will be doing  a far more thorough job of that very shortly. I’ll be sure to link to her FF post as soon as it’s up, and in the meantime, I’m going to stick to the movies!

a

Machete Maidens Unleashed (2010)

machete maidens unleashed

Director: Mark Hartley (in attendance)

Writer: Mark Hartley Continue reading

Piranha 3D

Posted in A+ Review, Action Movie Review, Film Review, Horror Movie Review with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on August 25, 2010 by xymarla

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You may think this grade is a wild overestimation. After all, in earning an A+ on this blog, Piranha 3D is in the company of such gruesome cinematic feats as Candyman and Hellraiser. But for what it is—an uproarious, 88 minute schlockfest drenched in gore and teeming with glorious, fully dimensional nudity—Piranha 3D is FLAWLESS!

piranha

Holy shit, you guys! I LOVE THIS MOVIE SO CRAZY MUCH! After reading several fantastic reviews and hearing some bordering-on-sacrilege praise from my friends, my expectations were outrageously high. Mr. Marla kept warning me: “Don’t build it up too much!” but I couldn’t help myself. I built that shit HIGH, my friends. ALL THE WAY UP. And I STILL wasn’t prepared for the utter transcendence that was this movie. Continue reading

David Cronenberg Retrospective: The Fly

Posted in A+ Review, Film Review, Horror Movie Review, Retrospective: David Cronenberg, Sci-Fi Movie Review with tags , , , , , , , , , , , on July 16, 2010 by xymarla

  

Welcome back to the David Cronenberg Retrospective! Our next entry marks a transitional period for Sir Cronenberg, an evolution into the more accessible, character-driven stories that make up the latter part of his career. Cronenberg’s 1986 film The Fly, a remake of the 1958 flick by the same name, is a human story swathed in genre trappings. Really icky, awesome, genre trappings.  

 

Continue reading

Quickie Review: [rec]

Posted in Film Review, Horror Movie Review, Quickie Review with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , on July 9, 2010 by xymarla

Another day, another Marla-come-lately review. Since most of you have probably already seen Jaume Balagueró and Paco Plaza’s Spanish film [rec], I won’t take up too much of your time, particularly because I’m going to do a Remake vs. Original with this and the American remake Quarantine next week!

So: [rec]–it’s good, no?

We begin with footage from host Ángela Vidal’s (Manuela Velasco) Insomniacstyle show titled While You Were Asleep. No, not While You Were Sleeping. That’s different. Ángela and her cameraman Pablo (Pablo Rosso) are filming a typical night in a fire station. They’re assigned to travel with appropriately yummy firefighters Manu (Ferran Terraza) and Álex (David Vert). They’re soon called to the scene of an apartment building, not yet understanding what the emergency entails. Ángela, Pablo, Manu and Álex are immediately locked in the apartment building with a police officer, a medical intern, a dozen anxious residents—oh yeah, and some straight up zombies. The surrounding police tell them that everything is under control, but is it?

IS IT?! (no.) Continue reading

The Human Centipede: First Sequence

Posted in Contributor: Jerry, Film Review, Horror Movie Review with tags , , , , , , , , , , on June 14, 2010 by jerryochoa

by guest blogger Jerry!

The Human Centipede marks the first time in nearly 40 years of professional film reviewing that Roger Ebert has refused to issue a “star” rating. According to Ebert, “The star rating system is unsuited to this film. Is the movie good? Is it bad? Does it matter? It is what it is and occupies a world where the stars don’t shine.”

Strong words, Mr. Ebert. Ebert’s review set the tone for what was to follow – an unprecedented outpouring of disgust, outrage, and occasional praise for a unique genre film that seemed to be seeking out exactly that mix of emotions.

It’s hard to imagine a movie with more horrified/fascinated hype behind it, and in that sense, Ebert is right. The second you hear the title, The Human Centipede, you pretty much know whether or not this is a movie for you. Still not sure? Here, take a look at the poster:

Any questions?

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Splice

Posted in Film Review, Horror Movie Review, Sci-Fi Movie Review with tags , , , , , , , , on June 9, 2010 by xymarla

 

You should know that Splice is not a movie for the feminists among you. Or the scientists. I’m frankly flummoxed as to how to proceed with this review, as Splice is about a dozen movies rolled into one and it’s very nearly stumped me. Some of those movies are pretty sweet. Some of them are tedious and stupid. And some of the movies are offensive and infuriating. Allow me to break it down for you!

Continue reading